Webbisms:

KFC decides to put chicken on menu.

Walking taco craving ends after first scoop.

I like my cream spanked not whipped.

Teacher of the year reveals she never taught.

Soda now the number one drink among sick people.

On my run this morning it was partly cloudy but they are filled with creme fraiche.

Saw this in my rear view mirror, though I think it's broken. "ecnalubmA"

Laugh track funnier then sitcom.

Photoshop admits cover-up.

Teen humiliated by intelligence of True Grit star Hailee Steinfeld.

U.S. Mint night shift now makes peppermint patties.

Teens loitering helps business.

Pringles decides to package broken chips in bags to compete with frito lay.

Kathie Lee Gifford will add fourth name by 2012.

I'm at Cafe Marco, yelling Polo!

Pharmaceutical CEO'S now the new drug lords.

Producers of Glee were planning an episode that would feature the cast performing Justin Bieber's greatest hits, all two of them.

Subway's Jared says footlongs are just to big.

Man with dyslexia says he is not sure he has a AAA membership.

Just ordered a pizza and asked if they would stop at In-N-out and pick up 3 4+4s

2012 Prius To Feature ejection seats.

Papa Murphys employee found in storage room eating Papa Johns pizza. When asked why, he said, "I like my pizza baked."

If no on ever took risks, Neil Simon could have never said, Michelangelo would have painted the sistine floor.

When I was In school the "good stuff" meant jawbreakers.

Being beautiful is the accident that others have to deal with

One thing that money alone cannot buy is your girlfriend treating you like crap.

Mozart never won anything either.

Grey's Anatomy, the book is much better.

I just watched 127 hours on DVD. I think I got ripped, it was only 1 hour & 34 mins.

Mcdonalds will offer the McSheen fried brain nuggets lightly toasted with tiger sauce.

CarPool lane on Interstate has to much chlorine.

Inmate population drops as inmates escape.